I guess in my case it’s more, “All good things may come to an end.”
Don’t worry. You’re not getting rid of me so easily. I’m not talking about my blog. I’m talking about my S-Anon meetings. The meetings are on a pause for the summer due to low attendance and I miss them terribly. For me, it’s not only a safe place to share my experiences but one that reminds how things used to be in my world. They serve as a reminder how important it is for Devin and I to stay in recovery.
I was the trusted servant for our small group for close to two years. I was also the treasurer, the contact person for newcomers and the WSO, performed local outreach, and a meeting facilitator. It was a lot for one person but I wanted our meetings to thrive so when no one volunteered, I took on the responsibilities.
Last fall I got help from another member to be the meeting facilitator and that allowed me to get a break every other week. But, even with that help, I was burnt out. Two years was just too long to do it all, no matter how I loved the meetings. I knew I needed to step down as a trusted servant when I started to resent not getting additional help for the other positions I held. It revealed I was in the wrong place mentally.
In May I stepped down from being a trusted servant leaving all those positions vacant. We sent out an email and text to the members asking for volunteers. It wasn’t fair that the other woman take on everything I was leaving behind. Sadly, only one person stepped up to help lead meetings and she wasn’t able to do any in July.
Six weeks after I stepped down, I was asked by the two volunteers what I thought about stopping the meetings until school was back in session. As difficult as it was for me to say, (control freak that I can be at times), I said it was up to them since it was their time they were donating to the group.
I wanted to persuade them to keep the group running. We never know when a newcomer may come along. I wanted to tell them to send out texts to those we haven’t seen letting them know we were thinking about them. I wanted to ask what kind of outreach they were doing to maintain attendance. But, I didn’t do any of that. Those were things I chose to do and I shouldn’t expect them to do the same.
As my favorite saying goes, “A high expectation is a premeditated resentment.” I needed to lower my expectations and let the meeting go. If it’s meant to start up again in the fall then it will. If not, I am happy with the work I put in and those who have helped me on my journey.
Of course, that doesn’t mean I won’t still miss them. I’ll just have to find another anon meeting to attend.
Have you ever had something you loved end abruptly?