Thursday, May 15, 2014

Like Blades of Grass

from a distance he blends

meant to camouflage

eyes search the formations

blue and white crisp uniforms

          which one are you?

counting cadets

like counting blades of grass

one, two, three,

from the right.

like counting out marching steps.


     Wrong company

     Wrong letter

     Wrong feeling

one, two, three, four,

another count calls

wind blows,

flags flap,

That’s it!

sun catches the glimpse of metal

a row of sabers lift to the sky

         (familiar heat beat felt)

It’s him!

a dozen cadets assume command

a select few to lead several hundred

they are uniform

they lead uniquely

~~~@  ~~@

Recently we went to watch the Change of Command Ceremony of my son at his college.  He was chosen to take command of his company.  It was a beautiful Pass & Review parade.  At first, it was difficult to find him in the crowd, but, a mom knows her son!

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Something Was Off - IWSG Post

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Everything was falling into place.

The edits nearly completed.

A new story idea formed in the ol’ noggin.

The aches and pains were taking a backseat.

The A-Z Challenge was rockin’ and rollin’.

But something was off.

I couldn’t put my finger on it.  I just knew I wasn’t emotionally ready to let go of my first novel.  It had nothing to do with my trust in my critique partner.  In fact, he returned it with additional edits – something I was more than happy to complete. 

It was the feeling of being in the middle of editing two WIPs and wanting to write another while the idea is fresh in my head.  Just get the idea on paper.  I’m afraid I’ll have three WIPs, then four, five, six.  Will the WIPs ever stop?  Will I ever have a published novel?  Will I ever feel comfortable enough to stop editing?

Maybe I need to apply the brakes now.  Stay focused on finishing the two books I’ve written already.  Find a second critique partner to torment.  Then, then I can put more words on paper.

I don’t know though. 

These voices in my head continue to speak to me.

Louder and louder. 

They want to be heard.  They want to become characters, have personalities.  I’m not sure I can contain them much longer.

So, who will win?  The editor or the writer?  I think it will depend on what day of the week it is.

Or perhaps if it’s raining or if the sun’s shining. 

Today, today the rain is here.  So, I think maybe I will just write one page.  Just to see if that character is ready to be introduced into my world. 

Just one page.

Have you ever been torn between editor and writer mode?  
What about between doing one thing and doing another? 

~~Thanks to Alex J. Cavanaugh for making this happen.  You rock!~~

This has been a part of the Insecure Writer Support Group.  A place to talk about your struggles and your joys.  Please join in on the fun.  We'd love to have you.  Special thanks to the other co-hosts:   Mark Koopmans, Joylene Nowell Butler, and Lisa Buie-Collard!

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Reflections Post: A-Z Challenge

So, a few months ago, I was reading Alex’s blog.  He was probably bragging about how awesome he is (you know him) or maybe he was just saying that the A-Z Challenge is a ton of fun. Either way, I read about the A-Z Challenge on Alex’s blog a few months ago and signed up.  I was totally stoked.  I cranked out post after post way ahead of schedule.  I was almost ready!

Then, April rolled around.  It was time to start the Challenge. The first two weeks went smoothly.  I had my posts set to schedule.  (In your face, cat!)  The third week, um, not so much.  That’s what happens when you don’t stay on top of some of your posts and only have them written a couple of days in advance.  The fourth week, fuhgeddaboutit.  I was cramming like a college student!  Some posts were written the night before they were due.

But, it was a ton of fun!  Well worth the late nights and early mornings.  (Now I know what my son is going through right now with finals at college.)

I met so many new people.  And, many of them weren’t even in the Challenge. I met them through reading comments they made in other’s posts. I find lots of people that way.  People who leave heartfelt remarks are people I want to know.

I didn’t do the Challenge just to drive up my numbers.  While they did go up – I think I picked up fifteen  – I did find quality blogs to follow.  I also decided to close down my writing blog and combine it with this one again.  Trying to maintain two blogs is just a pain in my rear.

Will I do it next year?  If I’m not working – yes.  But I sure won’t do it on sex addiction because dear God, that was a lot to deal with mentally.  Thirty days of sex addiction in a row.  Whew!  It’s one thing to live it, it’s another to write it, comment on it, write it, comment on it; wash, rinse, repeat.  (Note to self: Remember you just wrote that!)

Click here for other reflections in the series.

I’ll be back tomorrow for Insecure Writers Support Group where I’ll be a co-host from this blog.  W00t W00t!