As I sit and listen to the rain fall and wind howl outside my windows and wonder if, or more likely when, will my power go out as a result of Hurricane Sandy, I realize just how powerless a person can truly be at times. I am reminded of the step work I have completed and the things we say at our S-Anon meetings and how they apply not just to our SA worlds but also to our everyday lives world too.
I have done all of the preparation work I can think of to ready for this storm. I bought bottled water, canned goods, gasoline for the generator and made sure we had enough kerosene for the grill. Yet, all the preparation won’t stop the storm, it will only make life a bit easier if we lose power or God forbid have some structural damage like we did last year when we had to replace the roof.
It made me realize, all of the preparation work I have done to ready myself for the storm of any slips or relapse. I’m working the program, attending S-Anon, reaching out to my contacts, writing, trying to figure out a safety net for my daughter and me and always working on improving myself. Yet, all the preparation won’t stop the slip or relapse, it will only make it easier for me to deal with if it happens.
I’m grateful I decided to stop being such a bullheaded, stubborn woman and admitted I couldn’t do it alone. I needed help. I cannot believe how much I’ve gotten back from my S-Anon group, which is growing a little each week and it’s beautiful to watch.