Monday, September 24, 2012

"Dan My Sweet" - No Soup For You!


Working Dan at Shameful Promotions has threatened my beautiful, innocent, turtle all because of yesterday's poem.  See, Dan hates the “M” word and when he heard I was going to write a poem about Migraines, he wanted to write his own called My Grain, before mine posted yesterday. (Don't tell him but it was actually good.)  This resulted in the threats to my cute, innocent turtle.  Look at him all sweet looking. Awww!!
These vile threats from Dan were posted on Twitter:  “Oh it is definitely on now! You like turtle soup?”, he said.

Dan made threats on his blog, “That poor turtle. With his life in the balance of Workingdan's hands it's hard telling what kind of torture it will endure!”; and even added “Maybe she can't be beaten...but her turtle can! Muwahhaha! *evil laugh*”     The horror!!  How could Dan be so evil?

Even I, sweet, kind-hearted, Elsie, have been threatened on Twitter, “hahaha! Poke out her one eye with 2 sticks!”, Dan exclaimed.

It left me with no choice.  I had to call for back up…..




I’m sorry, Dan.  You left me no choice.  Now, please, leave my turtle alone or my clown friend here may be set loose....and I'm fairly certain he mentions you becoming turtle soup.....

Come on turtle, it's safe now.  Come home with me.  Dan won't threaten you anymore.


~~~~~~~

Dan - I had a blast doing this!  I laughed my ass off the whole time.  Now, I'll let you enjoy your blogcation - you deserve it my dear friend!  Take care, rest, relax, enjoy your family and I hope you'll be back soon.  I'll miss seeing your posts and your comments.  I have to step out for a little while today, but I'll be back this afternoon.

101 comments:

  1. Hahahaha. I almost, but not quite, feel sorry for Dan. He picked on the turtle, he mocked the one eye and he's insulted the NY Giants-he's got it coming. (let's pretend I know something about football).

    I do wish I could see the look on his face when he watches this. No one would guess that you're capable of anything this devious. I'm so proud of you right now.

    I'll be back later!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This was fun to do for sure! Plus, Dan is fun to tease, he takes it all in stride and listen to you, all innocent sounding, like you had no idea about any of this or any suggestions - ha ha ha!!! =P

      The only thing you need to know about football is = New York Giants #1

      I'll be out and about later too. People expect me to feed them around here, pfft!

      Delete
    2. Moi, be involved in something like this. Well I never. Okay I'm lying, I may have made a suggestion, but that's all I'll admit to in a court of law!

      Husbands and children needing to eat, who do they think they are-family.

      I'm off to get some sleep as I've done all my morning commenting on the people who post a.m.
      I'll see you when I crawl out of bed!

      Delete
    3. Anne,
      This clown is your stalker right, he gives me hejigibillies . Dan hope you learnt your lessons, this Elsie turtle is just a turtle under the shell, if you wake the beast she can collapse you like a ninja

      Delete
    4. Shocking that our Elsie can be so ferocious!

      Delete
  2. When someone calls in a clown, it's time to just stop. It takes a certain level of madness to go that far, and I don't want to mess with someone who is that mad. I would say I don't think Dan would harm a turtle but then I remember this is Dan. I'm sure he won't harm YOUR turtle though. At least, not now.

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    1. The clown is creepy, isn't he? Gah!! Dan has driven me to that certain level of madness by messing with my turtle. That little guy is like one of cyber kids...(just look at how cute he drew it!)...I have to protect him. I'm hoping Dan will leave him alone now.

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  3. I kind of find it funny how only the turtle has one eye. Though, am I missing some kind of inside joke here?

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    1. There is a bit of a backstory, DWei although not long. You can click the links in the post for a good laugh because Dan is hilarious! He is also the one who drew the adorable turtle for me. The one eyed gal is supposed to be me, Elsie, and he and another blogger, Pat and his evil cat (RhymeTime), tease me about being one-eyed all the time. Dan also teases me about talking about when I have Migraines but it's all in fun because he hates that I get them. So, he threatened the turtle when he found out I was doing the poem and also did a Migraine poem of his own.

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  4. I'm so confused as to what the guy's deal is. Like I've seen his videos on Pat's page before and I think I'm sure it's an act but that doesn't really matter because he cracks me up, every single video I've watched is utter gold. But yeah, great post Elsie, hopefully Dan will stay away from the turtle for now, turtle soup sounds like it could be good though!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This guy is so awesome! He works with no script, just the barest of information and he is off and running with videos like this. You're right, it is gold! Creepy, scary but gold nonetheless. I'm hoping this will help keep my turtle safe from Dan...but one never knows what Dan will do. Thank goodness for his blogcation!

      Delete
  5. When life gives you a tutle make a turtle soup :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ooohhh, look at Alex - coming in HOT the first time at my blog! LOL

      Thanks for stopping by, Alex...I think..hmm, I may have to keep on eye on my turtle when you're around...LOL

      Delete
    2. I loved this comment though I hate the brutality

      Delete
  6. Danzel is a true poet deep in his heart, he could easily start a whole new era in the world of literature and poems. Danticism or Dantesainse :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dan is a very talented writer. I have been impressed so many times while over at his blog - from his moving posts, to his hilarity, then his most recent story telling and now his poems..it just keeps getting better and better. But the latest was truly the best!

      Delete
  7. I have a commenter from NY City, Baxojays, he is alllll into turtles. On his fb and blog, he does turtle tuesdays....or may it's thursdays.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll have to send my poor little turtle to him for protection!

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  8. Well, if that doesn't make Workingdan shit a blue brick, I don't know what will!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I always shit blue...because you see, I eat, sleep, breathe and shit Colts football!

      Delete
    2. Hey, wait, I bleed blue because I'm a Giants fan...

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    3. You're shit and your blood change colors based on the team you like. Holy Crap, football is hard core!

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    4. That it is Anne! Once football consumes you, you will never be the same!

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    5. There is one thing I do know and love about football and that's the food people eat during a game. Love me some wings.

      You know a rugby game only takes 80 minutes to play. It's the hours and hours a football game takes that I can't adjust to. And if I drank pints for that long, I'd be dead!

      Delete
    6. Dan, one day maybe we can Anne to sit down and watch an entire game of football but she will have to root for MY team not yours.

      Football is only an hour, Anne. It's just spread out with commercials, half-time, fighting, flags, replays...*poof* three-four hours later you're drunk, full of great food and passing out on the floor hoping your team won...you can do it - I have faith!!

      Delete
    7. I will definitely root for your team Elsie, just don't tell my FIL as he's a Colts fan.

      We don't have all the adverts. 80 minutes and BANG it's over and we're free to brawl with one another! The most fun is the local games when the guys go to the pubs all sweaty and dirty after the game. It's grand as everyone gets drunk and gambles!!

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    8. A colts fan! You have chosen the right family!

      Delete
  9. LMAO look like Anne made a good suggestion. Maybe she is coming around to her stalker guy, some kind of fetish? hahahaha It's good that she let you borrow him though, I'm sure sharing is fine. Clowns and one eyed people can make good pairs. Oh the cat can't help himself.

    Dan will surely pay if he messes with the turtle though for that guy could creep out all, but his videos are great at any rate.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. There will be no breeding going on here. I'll leave that for the cat and the Viking woman. The clown is far to creepy for me. I'll save myself for Michael instead. Although, Anne was awfully kind to loan her guy to me for the day LOL

      Yeah, I'm thinking Dan won't want to mess with my turtle now. At least that is my hope!!!

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    2. Saints Preserve Us! Did the Cat say something positive about me. I'm feeling faint.

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    3. He has been nice lately hasn't he?? He must have something up his sleeve!

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    4. He's up to something. I'll step carefully when I walk today. I expect to find poo somewhere!!

      Delete
    5. haha I hope she didn't charge interest on the loan though, those clowns can rack up the rates pretty quickly.

      The cat is nice all the time, what are you talking about? Nothing is coming due, nope never haha hmm or then again.

      Delete
    6. Good thing you mowed yesterday, Anne - tread lightly, my dear!! He may have Pringle cans laying about.

      Nah, my girl would never do that to me (plus I think she's kinda glad to have him here for awhile).

      When is the cat nice? It's so rare, it's like it never happens! I don't trust it!

      Delete
  10. Everyone should have an arch nemesis. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And the best part is, he's one of my best blogging buddies =)

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    2. I've always shared LG's feeling on this matter :) I've been searching for my arch nemesis but none is strong enough to oppose my powers ... :(

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    3. One day you'll find your nemesis...you just have to keep searching =P

      Delete
    4. Bersercules is my Evil Nemesis and he's gone. I'll never find another like him.

      Darling no one can withstand the power of your fabulousness. Tisn't possible!

      Delete
    5. or maybe me is me own biggest nemesis... yep, that's it :)

      Delete
    6. Berserk is just on a tiny hiatus, he'll be back soon - I hope!!

      Naw, you're to sweet to be anyone's nemesis, Dezz =)

      Delete
    7. I'll be a nemesis to all of you! I bring the pain. I bring the shame! Who's next?

      Delete
    8. You're far too sweet darling to go against :)

      You Dan are just perfectly foul and that makes you the perfect Evil Nemesis. If you become mine, you'll have to compete in my wacky, spontaneous Challenges!!

      Delete
    9. You know me, I don't abide to rules very well. If you challenge me with a set of rules, I will only break them and bury you!

      I'm on an evil streak here lately! No one is safe from the wrath of Dan!

      Delete
  11. Replies
    1. I will be back when I have time to thoroughly read through this and watch the video. Something tells me I need to heat up my pot for soup!

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    2. You are going to bathe in your soup dan, I could season you with salt for free.

      Delete
    3. @elsie- and did you just go soup nazi on me? I like soup! Not cool man, not cool. Keep it above the belt will ya?

      @Mama C- I hope it's chili soup, that's my favorite! Make it garlic salt if you must season me!

      Delete
    4. LOL-I just told the guy to tell you to leave my turtle alone or he would be back and then he made up the part about making *you* into turtle soup!! He means business, Dan!! You better lay off my cute little turtle or he's gonna get ya!

      Delete
    5. Dan just stay away from the circus and avoid clowns for the rest of your life. You never know when you might meet the "wrong" clown.

      Delete
    6. Chili soup? End of this battle you are going to be burnt like steak, steak your favorite steak Dan.

      I don't know how many peoples dinner was lost today because of this turtle soup menu and Dan steaks.

      Delete
    7. I would make for a fine steak! Grind me up, I make good burgers too!

      Delete
  12. You guys are too funny!!! I love reading about your bickering! I wish I could listen to the video at work though, it would really make me laugh :) :)

    P.S. Please tell me that turtle soup isn't a real thing!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dan is so much fun to bicker with - he takes it all in stride. Poor guy is trying to take a blogcation and here I am dragging him out of it. But, after today, I'm leaving him alone to rest and relax like he deserves.

      And, yes, it's a real soup. GROSS: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/emeril-lagasse/turtle-soup-recipe/index.html

      I can't wait until you watch the video, Jax - hilarious!! This guy is outrageous!! You give him the general idea and he runs with it.

      Delete
    2. LMAO...how do you guys get these people to make these videos?!

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    3. Oh la la, Sassy Jax, I love your picture! We are good, Jax, we are good!! =)


      (and I looked him up ha ha ha)

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  13. I'm at jury duty so I can't play the video... Or maybe I should, and I can get out of it? And then I'll just start muttering about Dan's turtle soup and I'll never be asked to serve on a jury again. Score!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Be careful, Bryan! Judges have an eye for spotting people who try to get out of jury duty!

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    2. That would be classic! Playing this video and kicked out jury duty. But, yeah, Dan is right. They do have an eye for that kind of thing....drats!

      Delete
  14. Did you know that Mock turtle soup is made from calf brains?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please tell me you're kidding! This is getting worse and worse...

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  15. Woah woah woah, this has gone too far. You've sent in the clowns. This isn't something you can easily come back from.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He messed with my turtle. I had to show brutal force, I just didn't realize how brutal it would be LOL

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  16. Help! I'm running for cover! OMG that clown was scary!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He is scary! I'm glad he's on my side =)

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  17. Oh my God I love Snapper soup. Have you ever had it? It's a Northeast US thing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would ask if you're kidding, but when I looked up the recipe for Jax, I came across Snapper soup. I've never tried it and I'm not sure I'd be able to anymore....

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  18. .... I.. why is this so creepy. Clowns and turtle soup and just, ugh. What. I feel mentally violated even

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And you thought some of my other posts were tough to get through - this one was pretty rough, huh? Even for me!!

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    2. I think you may have scarred him for life Elsie.

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  19. I hope that green thing between the turtle's legs is a tail. Because he's apparently not happy to see me. Then again, why would I want a turtle to be happy to see me? I've never heard of gay turtles.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. It's his tail, Al. I'm pretty sure he won't want to cross over into the human species...he'll stick with turtles...at least I think he will...better watch out, Al.

      Delete
  20. But, I thought Tammy Faye Baker was retired?
    Unless that's Mimi from the Drew Carey Show...?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm not quite sure who that is, I just know that if Dan doesn't behave himself and leave my turtle alone, this guy is going to turn him into turtle soup. LOL

      He does kinda look like Mimi now that I take another look!!

      Delete
  21. OMG..its the same guy ..this time with an awful mask ~

    Hope you are feeling better Elsie ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, Anne was kind enough to let me borrow him a bit to put the fear of God into Dan. It doesn't seem to be working though....Dan seems immune to clowns and such craziness as this.

      I started a steroid pack yesterday to break a five day Migraine, it should start working today =) Thank you!!

      Delete
  22. Howdy M'am. As one of our preferred customers we'd like to offer you an additional service at no extra charge.

    Catching a troll can be messy, some times they struggle and sometimes it takes a while before they bleed out. And when this happens, why it can leave behind a troll shaped stain that just won't come out of your blog.

    We've got a product that will wipe your blog clean no matter how badly that troll goes down. If you'd like to know more about this product contact us at www.wipeatroll.com


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ignore that guy over there, ma'am. He's a bit of a nuisance I have to deal with...he has been pestering my poor little turtle. Threatening to turn him into turtle soup and everything. Nasty business, nasty, I tell ya.

      I've noticed the stains and have had to cover them with sand but with fall coming the wind has been kicking up exposing the stains. I'm so glad your company has come up with a solution. I'll be sure to check out your product! Thank you! Please tell Guido he's doing a great job.

      Delete
    2. If Guido was doing such a great job, then why am I still here?

      Delete
    3. Just you girls wait! Wait until I get my internet turned back on! You gals are in a heap of trouble!

      I am unfazed by your stupid clowns and imaginary airlines...and your so-called troll named Guido!

      Soup...it's mmm mmm good!

      Delete
    4. Guido is real and so is my airline. I'm rubber, you're glue, anything you say bounces off me and sticks to you!! Nanny, nanny, boo, boo Dan!!

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    5. My my my.....it would seem my plan to keep Dan out of his so called blogcation worked after all! He just can't stay away from Blogger, can he, Anne? He loves him some Blogger!! He just can't wait to sign on and see what transpired during the night.

      Fire up the engines boys! We got us a plane to catch!!

      Delete
  23. I don't scare easy, but I need to change my drawers....now.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know right, that is one scary ass clown!!

      Delete
  24. For fucks sake, I had to pack a lunch just to get to the bottom of the comments!!

    Nitey nite my friend!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes and it's all my fault! I keep coming and commenting so you have to spend an hour to get to the bottom of comments section! I'm stalking this post...and those who dare to comment!

      Delete
    2. I love having my own stalker - you're the best kind too - public! You make my page hits rise and rise and rise =)

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    3. Next thing to rise will be your blood pressure! I've got something planned just for you and that precious turtle!

      Delete
  25. That's one scary clown, Elsie. Now allow me to go and change my shorts. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, no, another casualty in the shorts department. So sorry, Randy! LOL

      Delete
  26. I'm just here to drive up your page views and comments because my name is linked to this post and it will direct more traffic my way. Because you know, that's all I really care about.

    Now check this out!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvcJqcUlYTo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LMAO, Dan, what a great video - I love the wiggling fingers! So, yeah, it's pretty obvious you're a daddy...trying to be a grumpy ol' troll...through Dora...

      Delete
  27. This post wouldn't be right without 100 comments so here I am!

    I'm a grumpy old troll who's hijacking your blog! *singing

    ReplyDelete
  28. how about 101! This was pretty funny stuff!

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for taking the time to comment. I'm here to help any way I can.