Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Poetry - or at least I tried....


I gave it a shot, my Hooligans.  I tried my hand at poetry.  Meh.  I don't know one iota about poetry except to tease Pat with it but here it is, just the same...please don't laugh to hard.  I decided to go with a kind of contrast theme that occurred to me while I was at the beach today.

Warm Thoughts

She walked alone along the sandy beach

Enjoying sounds of seagulls flying above her reach

The sun warming and tanning her tattooed skin

Each one marking a journey, a place she’d been

As waves crashed then ran across her toes

Her spirits lifted higher, how high could they go?

Turning, she walked into the cool, soothing ocean

Suddenly there was a wild commotion

Her children splashed and played beside her

Making her joy and her smile that much brighter



Cold Thoughts

The walking stick marked the trail upon the beach where she walked

Her eyes cast downward, avoiding any chance of talk

Further away from any sight

She knew what had to be done tonight

The stick dug deep into the sand

Cutting deeply into her hand

Seagulls squawked above her head

She shook her fist and wished them dead

The blood dripped down into the sea

The stick forgotten, she made her way towards destiny

She was never one to feel blessed

It was time for her to join the rest

66 comments:

  1. I really like Warm Thoughts although that may be because Warm Thoughts gives off really happy vibes while Cold Thoughts obviously doesn't. They're both expertly wrote though Elsie and for someone who doesn't care about poetry much they're incredible, they're definitely a change in tone from what we'd read over at Pat's blog!

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    1. Thank you, Matthew, you are far to kind. I thought it would be cool to do a light and a dark kind of thing. I love the beach and it's my go to place for when I'm feeling dark, it always makes me feel bright.

      My stuff at Pat's is always thrown together LOL

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  2. oh, my, poor seagulls and the crazy lady shaking a fist at them :(

    Nice ones, Elsie, bet you enjoyed writing the poems :)

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    1. I know, but I need the innuendo - I love the seagulls, even when they are annoying me LOL

      I did enjoy the challenge of the poems and will give it another try soon, I think.

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  3. Well done! I knew you could do more than blabber on about migraines! lol

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    1. What a fantastic idea, Dan! A poem about Migraines!!! Thank you!!!! You'll be seeing it soon..I promise ha ha ha

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  4. I can do poetry...
    Here I sit
    broken-hearted.
    Came to...now, what was that next part?
    Wow, I guess I can't do poetry.
    Nuts.

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    1. I'm impressed Al, you gave it a good try...I know next time you'll nail that line...lol

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  5. I love them Elsie (sometimes I made some little poems but im so timid lol)
    Poetry is sometimes a way to put our thoughts and hopes; really nice:)
    love warm thoughts;)

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    1. I, for one, would love to see your poems, Gloria. If you ever wanted to share them, you could always share them here as a guest post =)

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    2. Thanks Elsie maybe hehe
      dear really I think someone laughing me :)

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    3. They won't laugh here, Gloria - much love here =)

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    4. I know but ....the cat always laughing me LOL

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  6. WAY WAY better than I can do! Great job!! :D

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    1. Thank you so much, JoJo - you're so sweet!

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  7. Hi LOvey . . . Loved all of it! Been away for ten days camping . . . Will do a post tomorrow, but just been catching up on some blogs tonight. I missed you. I've totally caught up with your blog, couldn't bear to miss anything! (The Golden throne and purple corset to name just two!)
    Have to go now, as it's past one in the morning and early start tomorrow. Much love to you Lovey, good to be back x

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    1. Lovey!!!! Camping - sounds like a big time!! I thought you just went? Did you go again? I admit, I was worried about you...I read your blog and didn't see any updates and hoped everything was alright....I'm glad to hear all is well.

      Hugs and love back!!!! I'm so happy to see you my Lovey!!!! xoxoxo

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  8. Not bad for the first time...ha..ha... One trick I learned is to use metaphor and images and the ocean is full of it ~

    Here is one for you:

    sea calls
    warm on tattooed skin

    urgent cries i hear
    as seagulls fly above my reach

    how high will they go ?
    my eyes linger on faraway blue

    to mark a new journey,
    someday, i will


    Happy day to you ~



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    1. Oh, I love that, Heaven - so pretty!! And, you probably just whipped that out in five minutes LOL

      Mine took about thirty minutes to do both. I wanted to show in the first one that the lady (me) had used her tattoos to mark difficult times in her life, had kids and her world had become brighter. In the second poem, the times never became brighter and as a result, she lost her family so she killed herself.

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  9. I guess you can pull them out
    The seagulls just want the trout
    Or whatever other trash is around
    They'll take whatever is found
    Damn squawking birds
    And their stinky turds
    Liked the contrast of one against the other too
    And Pat but not the cat knew it could be done by you
    The cat still thinks you cheated
    As the loo was greeted
    Just won't let that go
    At your show hahaha

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    1. The cat is always such a grump
      I use my staff and hit him in the rump
      Perhaps a slight of hand was done at my show
      but one that you will never know
      for I assure that the golden loo is really there
      Sitting in the Trump Tower Lair

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    2. Oh I believe it is there
      Of that I am aware
      Put who knows if it was used by you
      There was no picture of it in the loo hahahaha

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    3. I assure you I have sat upon that Golden Throne
      and I wasn't even there alone
      there with me upon my quest
      I had a very special guest
      my sister in law was there one time
      and she saw the golden shine
      we both sat upon the golden loo
      but I was the only one to poo

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    4. haha both shared the same loo
      How can that come due?
      You have some skill
      And some kind of will
      To both sit there
      Well you poo and she's just left to stare hahahahaha

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    5. The Golden Thrones sat in a row
      for all of us who had to go
      no need for either of us to share
      I love her, but to do that I do not dare

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    6. So instead you just watched and listened to each other pee
      Oh the thoughts that come out of me haha

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    7. The cat is just so sick
      It makes my brain think "ick"

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  10. I've tried my hand at poetry but the juvenile in me takes over and everything becomes a dirty limerick.

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    1. I don't Monkey...I bet you could write some good poetry. Your haunted house story had me all sorts of scared - you've got a very creative streak.

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  11. Love them both good job keep on keeping on :))

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    1. Thank you, Janice - I've got you in my thoughts this week =)

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  12. very nice! The beauty is that poetry can't be done wrong. but i agree with the dirty limerick thing...i do the same! lol

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    1. ps...im real excited that my comment isn't #68 out of 70 comments!

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    2. Welcome back, April!!! I hope you guys had a blast on vacation - you deserved it =))

      True, poetry is very subjective and I'm my own worst critic.

      You're funny - 70 comments LMAO

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  13. I agree with Eat My Scabs. I don't write it, but I sure enjoy reading it.

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    1. I enjoy reading it too - Pat and Heaven write it like it's so easy...when I started researching (yeah, I did homework) I saw how much goes into writing it and I was like, nah, I'm just gonna write like I would a story only with rhymes LOL Next time, I'll make it more of a challenge....

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  14. I like the second one the best and I'm not sure why. It could be that I identify with what's being expressed. I also like the abstract feel to it, the color, the ending of things coming.

    You can write poetry Elsie.

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    1. I like the second one the best too because it came to me much easier. I didn't have to twist and turn the words in my brain - they just flowed. I could see her walking down the shore and feel the stick in my hand and went with it. As I wrote it, I had another idea form in my head - I think I have a dark side....but I thought...ooohhh wouldn't that be cool to write about - no one would expect the ending!!!!

      Thank you, Anne =)

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    2. Do it, write the dark stuff. If it's there get it on paper. Verse can be about anything, there's no limitations and you don't really have to stick to an "accepted" form anymore.

      You know if they don't come easy for me, I don't write them. When I have to work at it, it's painful which is why I only do it once in a while.

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    3. Your work is so deep and meaningful. I love to read it and the other blog you have - I need to get back over there and read some of your work; it's been awhile...

      You're right, if it's in rattling around the ol' noggin, I should put it to paper regardless of the form or the topic.

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  15. I like it Elsie. I wish you would have put Cold thoughts first though. I liked seeing your spirits lifted. Very descriptive with simple, to the point, sentences.

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    1. I think that's why I put Warm Thoughts first...to have all this hope and optimism and then *BAM* have the unexpected happen. At least you can go back and read Warm Thoughts and have your spirits lifted again and you know that I'm a happy chick in "real" life - despite what Cold Thoughts says.

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  16. I like them both but I'm with Dan, lets here the one about migraines because I know I can relate to that.

    Love,
    Meemaw

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    1. Meemaw!!! My cyber grandma!! Hmmmm, I could make Dan mad and make you happy - now that makes me smile! A poem on Migraines, huh? I think I will do it... =))))

      xoxoxo

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    2. I will be waiting for it and I don't really think Dan will be mad.

      Love,
      Meemaw

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    3. That Dan is a real whiny bitch! Who we talking about? lol

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  17. as long as it comes from the heart, it's all good. xo

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    1. That's true and it's also coming from my wild imagination LOL

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  18. Hey Elsie, trying to catch up on my blog reading but failing dismally.
    I can't write poetry to save my life. Every time I do, they end up as though they were written by a 14 year old boy, all smut and innuendo.

    I enjoyed both your poems, each one conjuring up such vivid imagery. Well done. :D

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    1. lily! So good to see you. I know you've been "out of the loop" - I hope all is well. You, smut and innuendo? Say it isn't so! LOL

      Thank you for the kudos =)

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  19. The warm thoughts was my favorite. You may have a talent for poetry after all!

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    1. Warm thoughts is how I feel at the beach, could be why I enjoyed writing Cold Thoughts because it's so not me. Thanks, Blondie!

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  20. I told myself I was no good at poetry for the longest time. I had the excuse that I didn't know jack-all about it. In the end, it's something visual that pleases the ear.. you don't have to know anything.

    In other words, sweet job :)

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    1. Is this your way of telling me you write poetry too? If you did, it wouldn't surprise me with your appreciation of music. I'll make the same offer to you that I did to Gloria - you can always post a poem here, if you'd like!!

      Thanks, D4

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  21. So that is when you were at the beach with the shark tears and blue whale semen salted water?? I JOKE! Seriously though, that was nice. I have never ever been able to write a poem. Ever. Even in grade school my mom made my snow fun poem up for me. Something about slipping and sliding on ice and snow and there was a sled. I do not have poetry skills.

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    1. LMAO - exactly!! I had one poem floating around in my head already while I was hanging around the shoreline and then the contrast idea struck. I admit, I'm kinda sad your mom wrote your snow poem for you LOL But, you got me beat in cooking! I can follow a recipe and tweak it a bit but you, you are the master!

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  22. Nice poems, they really have a lot of imagery. Thanks for sharing them.

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    1. I'm glad I was able to create imagery for you - that's what I was afraid I wouldn't be to do - thanks, CM!!

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  23. This turned out really well. I enjoyed the warmth of Warm Thoughts (which I thought might turn sad half way through, but didn't. A pleasant surprise). And the second one I can relate to all too well. Having to rejoin everybody else, but also this

    "Seagulls squawked above her head

    She shook her fist and wished them dead"

    That made me laugh out loud. In a good way, of course. I love this line.

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    1. I wanted to put that line in the first poem because thats how I feel half the time I'm trying to catch a tan on my blanket and they are just squawking looking for food LOL

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